The state of my head...ow.

The good, fabulous news: I know what the next book is going to be! I have a kick-ass situation, and the heroine is dribbling herself out to me. I even have the perfect working title: LIGHTNESS.

The bad news: I can't really work on it yet. I'm not one of those people who can balance two books at a time, at least not full-bore. And SSP has priority. So...I've got a little queue going in my head. Actually with all the other stuff, it's more like a prizefight.

And first up... *ding ding ding*...in this corner, it's THESIS! 500 pounds and getting bigger by the minute, THESIS is a real contender. This bad boy knows he has priority, so he doesn't mind throwing his weight around and knocking everybody else out of the way.

In this corner...*ding ding ding*...CLASSES! Two of them this time, so they pack a mean double-punch. If you're not careful, they'll start twisting you around, tossing you back and forth to each other with all their homework and presentations and reading and projects. Watch out for them!

In the third corner...SSP! SSP looks a little bit on the weakling side compared to the other two, but don't count her out! She can grab hold of your brain and hang on!

And last but not least, in the final and fourth corner...FAMILY! They don't look too scary over there, biding their time, but they will absolutely beat up everybody else at the least opportunity. Look for FAMILY to win the overall title!

So that's what it looks like right now. That doesn't even include WORK, who just jumps in the ring and spars occasionally, or FRIENDS, or my volunteer stuff. So LIGHTNESS is there, taking notes and watching the fight, but I really can't let her have a go yet.

All your publishing questions ANSWERED!

Finally, after much struggle and heartache and dangerous adventures on your behalf, I have located the magic treasure box of Publishing Answers. This box is soooo magical (and sparkly) that it not only contains all the answers every writer wants to know, but it personalizes the answers for each person. So yes, the answers below really are for YOU. They are the real, truthful answers. No more waiting! No more endless wondering! No more twitching!

Now, I haven't tried it yet either, so I'm going to be surprised right along with you. I've made up a list of the usual questions, and we'll see what the oracle has to say.

Anyway, without further ado, here we go....

1. Will my book be published?
ANSWER: Maybe. It depends.

2. When will I get an agent?
ANSWER: When the time is right.

3. When will I get an offer?
ANSWER: When the time is right.

4. Is the book good enough yet? Should I send it off?
ANSWER: No.

5. How many times will I need to revise this book?
ANSWER: Over and over and over and over and over. Until it's ready.

6. Will I go insane before I finish this book/land an agent/get an offer? Will all my hair be gone, because I ripped it out by the roots? Will I be old, and gray, and peering at the screen through massive grocery-store-bought magnifying glasses?
ANSWER: BWA HA HA HA HA HA HA.




{looks at magic chest. looks at all of you. looks at magic chest again.}


{HACKS MAGIC CHEST TO BITS WITH HANDY AXE}

Whew. Sorry about that. I'll keep looking.