Friday, March 10, 2006

I'm not asleep... but that doesn't mean I'm awake.

Without enough sleep, we all become tall two-year-olds. ~JoJo Jensen, Dirt Farmer Wisdom, 2002

I couldn't sleep last night. Not just "it took me a long time to get to sleep" either. I couldn't sleep at all. I just lay there, hour after hour after hour, listening to my husband breathe, my mind spinning in a nightmare of shallow, nonsensical thoughts. And of course the panic. It's 1 AM and I'm still awake! It's 2:30. God, it's 4 AM, I have to get up in an hour and 45 minutes!

As usual, I think I drifted off around 5, and dragged myself up at 5:45. The good news is Child is at school, I'm at work and drinking coffee (thank God), and I'm semi-functioning. I have a lightheaded, buzzy sensation in my head, as though I might just float away in a little while. Maybe I'll try that, later. What I probably should do, really, is go write a new scene. Some of my best scenes have come from sleep deprivation. Maybe because the mind is half in dreamland anyway, and inhibitions disappear?

But first, before any writing can be done, I must do Actual Work. More later (if I'm not facedown on my desk).

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

I can completely relate to how you're feeling today. I think I drifted off about 3:30 or so, but otherwise my night was much the same as yours. Bleh!

Kathy

Susan Adrian said...

Kathy:
Oh, no! What's up with that? I blame mine at least partly on the glass of wine I had with dinner--wine seems to affect me that way lately. {shrug}

Sorry to hear about your rough night too. May we both sleep well and long tonight!

Anonymous said...

Hi Susan,

I'm coming in late here (my computer time is limited), but congrats on the blog! How is the rewriting coming along? I know you have been working very hard.

Smooches,
Rhonddalyn

Anonymous said...

Hi Susan,

Bleck. Reminds me of that one Seinfeld where George makes himself a little nap station under his desk. Maybe you should curl up under your desk with a pillow? {g}

I will forego my usual mid-morning snooze as a show of solidarity for the sleep-deprived mothers.

Best wishes on the new scene.

--Rose

Susan Adrian said...

Hi Rhonddalyn! Great to see you here. {s}

I haven't been working as hard as I should, so the rewrite's a little slow. But I hope to be embarking on the fun actual writing part (rather than reviewing) now.

Don't be a stranger!

Susan Adrian said...

Rose:

{psst} I DO have a nap station under my desk! Unfortunately today I had a lunch meeting, so no nap (AND no writing). {sigh} I've compensated by now with so much caffeine that my poor body has no clue what to do. Hopefully I can collapse this evening...

Well really, hopefully tonight I can sleep. That would be a good thing.

Thanks for the solidarity!

Anonymous said...

Hi Susan!

Now that you have an “official” blog you are going to have to tell us more about your new revelations about book 2. >eg< Any juicy details are appreciated. >g<

Rhonddalyn

Susan Adrian said...

Hey Rhonddalyn! I'll post more about Book II this week--promise. {s} Wouldn't want to keep you in suspense! (okay, you know better than that. I would, maybe)

Susan