Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Deep Thoughts

The universe seems to be sending me a message today. I got a work email from our wellness division talking about the importance of forgiveness and kindness to our health; holding onto resentment and hard feelings hurts US. Then I looked at my planner for today:

"I would rather make mistakes in kindness and compassion than work miracles in unkindness and hardness." --Mother Teresa

Hum. Kindness.

I admit that I am not necessarily a kind person. Empathetic, yes. Supportive, yes. But also impatient, driven, inwardly focused. Realistic, blunt. Sometimes I say things that were better not said; sometimes I concentrate on myself and my own family and friends instead of the stranger who needs help. I just get oblivious.

I also get resentful--I hate that about myself and am working to change it, but there it is. My ultimate push button is if I feel I've been dissed or slighted. It's really hard for me to forget and forgive purposeful slights.

So maybe it's time to reevaluate a little, for myself and the other people around me. Kindness and compassion. Greater awareness of others. Forgiveness. Well, I shall try.

(It's a good thing I still have nasty characters, so I can let my evil side out without hurting anybody!)

Medieval Word of the Day: swenche: To trouble, harass, afflict. To mortify.

(I will not swenche. I will not swenche....)

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'm the same way! And then I *stupidly* feel like I'm trying too hard when I'm trying to be nice and kind. Forgiveness is especially hard on me. Resentment is so much easier. This thing that I'm going through with my father-in-law has been especially difficult.

Susan Adrian said...

Sara:

Yes, resentment and irritation is so much easier! But I can feel the effects on myself--I get anxious, snappish, and just no fun to be around. If I could let it go it would be easier in a different way...